Autistic burnout is a very real experience that many neurodivergent children and adults go through. When this happens, your child will need extra understanding and support as they work out their intense feelings.
As a parent or guardian of an autistic child, you play a very important part in creating a safe and accepting space for them. Learning to recognise the signs of autistic burnout and how you can help your child through them will help empower them to prioritise their needs and recharge in ways that work best for them.
What is autistic burnout?
Autistic burnout is an intense state of physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion. It often happens when a child has been pushing themselves too hard to keep up with the demands of their environment, particularly in situations that require them to mask.
Masking involves hiding or suppressing natural autistic behaviours to fit in with neurotypical expectations. This constant effort can be incredibly draining for neurodivergent children, and the intense autistic burnout they experience can result in releasing pent-up emotions when they are back in their safe spaces. This is known as 'the Coke bottle effect'.
Combined with the challenges of navigating daily routines, managing social and sensory input, and coping with frequent sensory overload, it's no wonder that autistic children may sometimes reach a point of 'crashing'. Every child is unique, so their burnout may manifest differently and in different ways.
Possible signs of autistic burnout are:
- Finding it difficult to continue their usual daily routines
- Experiencing increased physical and mental fatigue
- Showing heightened stress responses to everyday situations
- Withdrawing from social interactions more than usual
- Having more frequent shutdowns
- Struggling with tasks or skills they previously managed well
- Demonstrating increased sensitivity to sensory stimuli
Learning how to recognise the early signs of autistic burnout means parents and guardians can provide support and the understanding that their child needs to recover.
5 Tips to Support Autistic Burnout
When your child is going through burnout, create an environment that lets them decompress and implement some coping strategies to begin their autistic burnout recovery. What works one day may not work the next, so flexibility and patience are key.
1. Adjust Expectations and Reduce Demand
Adjusting your expectations and reducing demands on your child means recognising that they may not be able to perform at their usual level, whether it’s in academics, social situations, or daily routines.
Think about temporarily reducing their schedule by limiting socialising or extracurricular activities in places where they feel they have to mask. This can help minimise stress and provide the mental and emotional space needed for recovery, recharging at their own pace, without pressure to perform or conform.
For example, if your child often experiences burnout after school, avoid activities that you know will further overwhelm them. This could mean rearranging speech and language therapy sessions or skipping at-home therapy activities altogether. This might feel counterproductive, but it will support them much better in the moments when they need it most.
Communicate openly with your child about their current capacity and let them know it’s okay if they need to express their feelings and needs and validate their experiences. Creating an environment where they feel safe sharing their limitations will motivate them to prioritise their well-being and take the necessary breaks to recharge.
2. Allow for Rest and Downtime
When a child is experiencing autistic burnout, give them time for rest and downtime after school or a busy week. Give your child the freedom to take breaks from their usual activities and responsibilities by letting them spend more time engaging in low-demand activities that they find calming or enjoyable, like reading, drawing, or watching their favourite shows.
As they get older, encourage your child to listen to their body and mind, taking a rest whenever they feel the need. Respect their need for unstructured time free from obligations or expectations.
3. Offer Sensory Tools
Sensory tools are really helpful for children experiencing autistic burnout, as they can provide comfort and help manage sensory input. These tools help with self-regulation and give children a sense of security during overwhelming times.
You need to become a sensory detective and identify their sensory profile, figuring out what they need in times of stress. Identify calming tools that your child finds comforting and soothing, like:
- Sensory lighting that projects colours on the walls
- Ear defenders that reduce auditory input
- Fidget toys or stress balls that can relieve their nervous energy
- Oral chews that provide oral sensory input
Reassure them to use these tools whenever they feel the need, whether it's during a movement, brain and sensory break or throughout their daily activities at home or school. Let your child choose which tools work best for them, as their preferences may change from day to day.
4. Create a Calm and Supportive Environment
A calm and supportive environment is not just their physical space but also includes the emotional atmosphere within the home.
Create a safe, quiet space where your child can retreat when they feel overwhelmed. This could be a designated sensory corner in their room or a cosy nook in a less-used area of your home. This gives them the chance to decompress from a stimulating day or regulate after school.
Beyond the sensory corner, work on reducing overall sensory overload in your child's surroundings by minimising loud noises, bright lights, and clutter.
Setting up a consistent routine can provide a sense of stability and predictability, which is comforting during times of stress. While it's important to remain flexible, having a general structure to the day can help your child feel more secure.
5. Provide Emotional Support
Your child may experience a range of emotions when experiencing burnout, including frustration, sadness, or anxiety. Being there for them emotionally can make a significant difference in their recovery process.
Open communication will let your child know that it's okay to express their feelings with a sense of safety and acceptance. Validate their experiences and emotions and reassure them that they are not alone. Autistic burnout is a natural response to overwhelming circumstances, so remind them that it’s perfectly acceptable to take time to recover and prioritise their needs.
Your child may need more time and space to process their emotions, so offer comfort and understanding rather than pressure to "get back to normal." Encouraging self-expression through writing, Augmentative and Alternative Communication (AAC), or verbal communication can also be therapeutic, letting your child process their feelings in a safe way.
Give Your Autistic Child the Appropriate Support to Thrive
Every autistic child deserves to thrive in a supportive and understanding environment. If you want to learn more about how to provide the appropriate support for your autistic child, Everyday OT is here to help.
Our resources and community are dedicated to empowering families and making sure that every child has the opportunity to flourish. Shop our hand-selected range of sensory tools so we can support you on this journey.